Sadly, I question everything I do, especially my writing. And I mean daily. I think when you have kids you automatically become more critical, striving to be a good parent. If you add all the doubting up...its exhausting being me, truly. Since this blog post is all about releasing our demons, I want to be done with this line of thinking.
I know it's not healthy, but unfortunately the life of a writer is an incredibly arduous one. And what's worse is writing is so subjective that people can be ruthlessly cruel when criticizing. My biggest challenge is being mindful of my thoughts. I've spent the last several months redirecting negative thoughts about my writing and so far that's sort of working.
People always ask...so how's your writing? I usually shrug my shoulders and say, "Fine." Truthfully, I'd like to go on a full rant and really complain, but I don't. What would be the point. I'm kinda feel'n like a "Debbie Downer" now and I never want to be that. No more wallowing. Thanks for letting me vent. Whew! I feel better.
Anything you want to bi*** about? Go ahead. Release the hounds!
Mina B.
19 comments:
That sounds like such a great group! It's good to learn to redirect negative thoughts, they don't help at all!
Have a lovely Wednesday :) thank you for your comment!
Nikki – inspire nordic
I think most writers have doubts, it's the strong ones that keep on going no matter what stuggles they have. Good luck with the writing. And keep going!
I struggle with self doubt too along with the fear of disappointing. Some days are better than others. But I'm stubborn and I think that keeps me writing most of the time. :D
Well, today gives you the opportunity to rant! Thanks for joining the IWSG.
I started doubting my writing abilities less when I attended a writing class/critique group. If you can find a group that encourages people to give positive feedback (what's great about your writing) as well as what needs to be improved, that could really help.
There's always something wonderful about someone's writing - it may not be perfect, there may be room for improvement, but there's always something really good. Giving other people positive feedback helps me see that's true for my writing too.
I think everyone suffers from self doubt now and again whether their writers or not. When I write essays for university I never feel good after writing it up until the point I get my results.
I read and review books for independant authors and I always keep in mind writing my review the feelings of the author. If I don't like something I might point it out but then always follow with a postive comment and feedback. I hope doing the group will help you :)
I'm impressed that you combined A-Z and Insecure Writer's Group. And I understand where you're at...writing is hard, and self-doubt it easy. Much more challenge to believe in the light at the end of the tunnel. Venting usually helps :)
Whenever I doubt my writing I just have to look at positive reviews and supportive emails (which I've printed out especially for such occasions!) and then I don't feel too bad :-) Just like you said, writing is subjective, and for every person who doesn't like your writing, there are probably a whole lot who do. And those are the ones you have to focus on.
Doubt is really a problem for me too. When I'm writing, I keep asking myself will the reader enjoy the story? Is it s waste of time. Then I realise, I should actually right for myself first. Like Rachel said, reading positive reviews does help alot, and the supportive emails.
Thanks for stopping by and following me on my blog. It's wonderful to meet you too, Mina :)
What you go through sounds a lot like what I go through. I think it's universal, but knowing that doesn't really help!
Stopping the negative self talk does help. My deep dark secret: sometimes I tape up affirmations to look at while I'm writing.
Mina, oh yes is there any other professions that suffers self doubt as much? Maybe musicians? angst. Tips to give? I have none! Write for yourself mostly and hang the rest. The problem is that writing is never done - it can always be improved on. So maybe we have such self doubt as we strive for perfection and will never find out! Keep blowing that self doubt away!
I hear you about the self doubt! As a teacher, I worry all the time if I am approaching things the right way! I question everything I do. I agree with you, as parents, we are more critical. You can't just blow things off when it comes to our kids. They are our future!
Sometimes I have to remind myself I'm writing for myself and for my future readers. I'm not writing for the cruel and ruthless commentators. I'm glad writing about this makes you feel better.
just keep on going and listen--check it as useful or not and write you as if no one would ever read it---keeps us honest
I am all doubt and no confidence. Everytime I face a blank page I have to tell myself I can fill it.
--Damyanti, Co-host A to Z Challenge April 2012
Twitter: @AprilA2Z
#atozchallenge
I've wanted to join that group for some time. It sounds bodacious. And you're right. The life of a writer is arduous. People can hurt with their words. That's why we have to develop that think skin.
Venting is good. Ranting is too. Ha! :-)
I always doubt my own writing skills, and it literally makes me flail when someone asks me for specific details about what I'm currently working on. I'm only writing for me right now, and I hate the idea of someone knowing anything about it until I clean it up enough to want to share. (Same thing goes with my painting.) Call me crazy, but my art is something very personal until I love it enough to release into the world.
I know the feelings well, especially when when receiving rejection letters from agents. They're hard to shake off sometimes. I then try to think of something funny to help me move on...like life lessons from Barney Stinson...whenever I'm feeling down, I stop feeling down and start feeling awesome...true story. :)
I doubt things all the time, oddly enough, especially the things I know I do well. I know. Total contradiction. My biggest issue is that "good enough" stage. It doesn't matter if everyone else loves my writing, my sewing, my creations, if I don't love it, it's not good enough.
Great post!
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