A-Z: "N" is for Nicholas in The Miller's Tale

For the A-Z challenge today I'm featuring part 2 of the Miller's Tale from The Canterbury Tales.  If you didn't read the first part, check out my J post here.

"N" is for Nicholas from The Miller's Tale.  Nicholas was an arrogant, pretty-boy character with way too much book smarts and not enough common sense.  He got his in the end so to speak.  LOL!

In part 1 of the Miller's Tale Absalom Allison's serenading caller, left furious with her and disgusting antics. He feels betrayed by Alison and storms off only to call on her again a short while later. Nicholas decides to be the one to stick his arse out this time. And boy did he pick the wrong time to become cheeky--no pun intended. Read these passages from CanterburyTales.org -- verses 607-628 and see how Absalom gets his revenge.

607  I am your Absalom, my own darling!

608  Of gold, quoth he, I have brought you a ring;

 
609  My mother gave it me, as I'll be saved; 

610  Fine gold it is, and it is well engraved; 

611  This will I give you for another kiss.

612  This Nicholas had risen for a piss,

 
613  And thought that it would carry on the jape

614  To have his arse kissed by this jack-a-nape. 

615  And so he opened window hastily, 

616  And put his arse out thereat, quietly, 

617  Over the buttocks, showing the whole bum; 

618  And thereto said this clerk, this Absalom, 

619  O speak, sweet bird, I know not where thou art. 

620  This Nicholas just then let fly a fart 

621  As loud as it had been a thunder-clap, 

622  And well-nigh blinded Absalom, poor chap; 

623  But he was ready with his iron hot 

624  And Nicholas right in the arse he got. 

625  Off went the skin a hand's-breadth broad, about, 

626  The coulter burned his bottom so, throughout, 

627  That for the pain he thought that he should die. 

628  And like one mad he started in to cry, 

As Absalom brands Nicholas's ass with a scolding poker, Nicholas screams to high heaven, practically waking the dead including the husband. In the end, Absalom is vindicated, the lovers are caught, and John, the fool, comes off like a madman. The pilgrims, however, are equal parts amused and outraged by the Miller's scandalous tale. Bahaha!!. Disturbing? A little. Funny? Very much so! :)


Mina B.

A-Z: "J" is for John from The Miller's Tale in Canterbury Tales

A-Z, baby! And today's "J" post is for John, a character in The Miller's Tale.  The prologues are infectious and vital to these tales.  Since the Miller's tale is directly after the Knight's Tale--remember the Knight's Tale? The one about the two prisoners vying for the love of the unsuspecting maiden, Emelye?  If you missed my post on the Knight's Tale click here.  Since the Knight did such a spectacular job with his tale, our trusty Host challenged the other travelers:

6 Our host, he laughed and swore, So may I run, 

7 But this goes well; unbuckled is the mail;

8 Let's see now who can tell another tale:

9 For certainly the game is well begun.

In short, he refers to the Knight kicking off their game with a noble tale and asks the questions to the other travelers who will be next.  Of course the Miller is drunk and offers to tell a tale that's worthy of a drunken fool.  And so goes the drunk Miller's vulgar tale about John the ignorant, wealthy carpenter, his young pretty wife (Alison) and a young boarder, Nicholas who cuckolds him.

Basically, John's oblivious to Nicholas seducing his wife and then another man, Absalom, comes along and tries to seduce his wife too.  The best part of this tale is towards the end.  Nicholas and Alison become more bold with their affair and Nicholas tricks John, sending him on wild goose chase to prepare for the impending flood.  Abaslom tries to seduce Alison by serenading her but all his attempts are futile.  She's tires of him and tells him she's in love with another.  One night after a night of lovemaking with Nicholas, she devises a plan and calls for Abaslom to her window to come give her a kiss.  Abaslom grows near, closes his eyes to do so and ends up kissing her bearded asshole. (Eww!)  Of course I laughed.  Chaucer warned us via the Miller's ranting that the tale was vulgar and it gets better.  Why?  Because the next part involves Nicholas and you'll have to wait for "N" to learn what happens.  

Do you remember The Miller Tale?  What about John or any of the others?  Do you find it funny or disgustingly inappropriate? 

Mina B.